Let's go to "The Goon"

So last Memorial Day my parents had this plan to go to Lagoon. I am not a fan of Lagoon on any normal day because it is so expensive just to get into the park-$41.95 plus tax just to get into the darn place! And then, on top of that, unless you bring your own food and drinks you have to pay like $3.50 for just a drink. It is crazy! My family always packs a cooler for food and drinks so we don’t have to pay for all that, but still, there are other fun things to do there that you have to pay for. Like the go-carts, for example, are about $7.00 a person. It is pretty ridiculous.

But on top of all that, I am six and a half months pregnant. So I totally wasn’t going to go. Like I would have fun just watching everyone go on rides? But then I talked to my brother Byron and he really wanted me to go so that it was he, my parents, and I. And then my mom offered to pay for my entrance into the park. So I agreed. Besides, there had to be something I could do right?

For all other pregnant women who are convinced to go to Lagoon by their loved ones, please be aware these are the rides that you can go:

Sky Ride-the one that goes from one end of the park to the other.
Ferris Wheel
Train
Flying Aces
Merry-Go-Round
Dracula’s Castle-Please note that there are 2 haunted houses in Lagoon. Dracula’s Castle and then the Terroride, which is across from the merry-go-round. Only Dracula’s Castle was approved for pregnant women.

Six rides that I found in the entire park! I was actually impressed that there was even six. Now, I didn’t go on all of the rides I listed. There wasn’t time to do all that and for my family to go on the rides that they wanted to go on. I went on the train, flying aces, and, because my brother forced me to go with him, Dracula’s Castle. But on top of that, I had fun with my family. My parents are fun to be around and my brother always makes me laugh. Byron and my mom were even good enough sports to go on The Cliffhanger because I asked them to. It was such a fun day even though I couldn’t go on all my favorite rides. So I just wanted to say thanks to my family for making it such a fun day!

WHAT THE H@#$?!?!?

On Monday night I was driving home from work and saw perhaps one of the weirdest things I think I have ever seen. I have seen some pretty random things, like a man playing a trumpet while driving down I-15. (No I am not kidding.) This however, was in a class all it’s own.

On the side of the road I could see a cop car parked with its lights on. There were no other cars pulled over nor were there any motorcycles or even a bicycle. But the cop was obviously talking to someone…I just couldn’t see who that was.

As the traffic inched closer I could see people looking. So naturally, when traffic came to a stop, I looked too. What I saw…oh boy! There was a tall skinny man who appeared to be in his 60’s. He was very pale and his gray hair was obviously thinning. He was wearing over-sized sunglasses on his face. You would think the following would all be normal right? WRONG!

His top was a bright red sports bra. I blinked a couple times to be sure I was seeing things correctly. His bottoms were just as weird being that they were a pair of some of the shortest denim cutoff shorts I think I have EVER seen! And I believe he finished his outfit off with a pair of strappy red heels. I am not 100% sure about this because he was standing in grass.

Oh wait! I also forgot to mention that across his exposed abdomen, written in red paint or red lipstick or some sort of red substance was the word “SLUT.” I am sure that this is what encouraged the police officer to pull over. The man must have been on foot because like I said, the cop car was the only vehicle pulled over. I wish I knew what had been going on with guy! Was he crazy? Did he lose a bet? Or perhaps was he advertising? And that poor cop just looked so confused.

I wish I could have taken a picture with my camera phone but as soon as could take the image in, traffic started moving again and so I continued on my way home. I have, however, used my paint shop feature on my laptop to give you a CRUDE artist’s rendition. I hope that this amazes all of you as much as it did me. ENJOY!

P.S. Notice how happy my picture looks! I am sure that no matter what, this man was a very happy man!

So Much...

I haven’t been blogging for the last couple months. Period. Life has been crazy and I have had many other things to do. I am however going to take a moment now to update.

Yes, Ryan is gone. I drove to Mississippi with him April 1st to April 5th and then with many tears and much sadness, left him there. Saying goodbye is never easy. But saying goodbye for six months to the father of your unborn child is much harder than I expected. I cried my whole flight from Gulfport Mississippi to Denver Colorado. I was sitting on the very last row with my hood up on my black jacket, sunglasses on, quietly sniffling and wiping away my tears. People probably thought I was a terrorist. I am sure the flight attendant with nervous about asking me if I wanted anything to drink because who knows what chain of events he might set off. Instead, I ordered water with extra napkins. He kindly brought me extra tissues instead.

Since that day, things have been okay. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t miss Ryan. He is my better half and it sucks not having him here. But I survive and so does he and we both know that what he is doing is important for the future of our family.

Right around my birthday, Ryan was very sweet and got me a new dog. Her name is Freya and we got her from the Utah Humane Society. We aren’t 100% sure what kind of dog she is. She must have some beagle in her and who knows what else. We have heard everything from Collie to Pit Bull to Jack Russell terrier. All I know is that I love her. She is a great dog. Well…she is a great dog with the exception that she is Houdini Dog. And when she escapes from her kennel, she makes a mess. A VERY BIG MESS! HUGE!

At first Ryan and I had her in a smaller wire kennel. Her escape from this was partly our fault. She was too big for this kennel and simply pushed on the back of it and popped the side open. From there she got into the garbage and used our hallway as a restroom. I think she also ate a pair of my socks.

So we upgraded. We bought a larger enclosed plastic kennel. She did fine in this kennel for almost 3 months. That is, she did until a couple weeks ago. I get home from a long day of work to be greeted at the door by my little escapee. I am also greeted my a massive mess including with little was left in my garbage can since I had taken it out the day before as well as a box of cereal that she had gotten out of my cupboard.

Upon inspection I discovered that she escaped by chewing a hole in the side of her kennel. No, I am not kidding. When I left for work, there was no hole. When I came home there was a hole, a dog on the loose, and very large mess. Don’t believe me? I have a picture. In one day, this dog chewed a hole in her kennel!

So now I am mad…mad at myself for being out-smarted by my dog. So I go to Petsmart and buy another wire kennel, but this one is much bigger. While there I tell a couple members of the Petsmart staff what my dog has done and they are amazed. Amazed by my escape-artist dog. I would go so far as to say they were impressed by her breakout skills.

But I can’t just leave it at the wire kennel now. She has already proven that she can pop the side open with these so I enlist the help on my Dad who uses nylon zip-ties to secure the kennel. Now I am sure she can’t get out.

What happened next is all my fault. I underestimated my dog. I should have known. The new kennel made it one day with no jail breaks. By day two, she had formulated a plan. At some point during the day, my dog got the bottom lock on the kennel door open and was able to then push the door open enough to squeeze through the bottom. And the reward for my mistake? The biggest mess she had yet to create. Not only did she crap on my floor, shred every bit of garbage she could get her teeth on, empty the bottom to shelves of my bookcase onto the floor, and tear open a box of potato flakes and bag of flour, but she also destroyed the plastic blinds in my kitchen and chewed 2 of the slats of my wood blinds in my living room. She wasn’t just upset she was in the kennel, she must have been furious and I paid the price for my ignorance and over-confidence. I once again was out-smarted by a 25 pound dog!

So now she is back in the kennel and I am having to padlock the door shut. It has held up for three days but I am no longer going to be arrogant about it. She has gotten the best of me three times now and I am not going to let that happen again. Hopefully this one will hold, but I am not going to hold my breath. My dog should be in a circus freak show. This is why she ended up at the Humane Society…she got the best of her last owners. But not me! I am determined to win this war!

Other than all of that, things are going just fine. The baby seems to be doing well and developing great. I am now about 23 weeks pregnant. And I am feeling all 23 weeks now. My first trimester was so easy that my second has been much harder. My OBGYN says this should be my “honeymoon period” but I am not feeling it. I didn’t have a hellish first trimester so all the changes I am experiencing now seem much worse than they may have for other women.

I have hip pain, bloating, fatigue, heartburn, and hunger. LOTS OF HUNGER! I can eat a meal and 60 minutes later, I am feeling hungry again. It is nuts! And my pants….I am wearing pants that have a stretchy panel in the front to accommodate my ever-growing belly. I feel like a damn Chia pet! All I can do the water myself and watch me grow. My weight gain has been perfectly normal but still, I feel like I have gained 20 pounds in this last month instead of only 4.

But I am happy with my development. Things are normal and I could not be any more grateful. I know life with my new baby will not always be this easy or normal but I can only count my blessing and continue to pray that things continue in this direction for the rest of my pregnancy.

Thanks to everyone who has kept in touch. I am always thankful for your love and support. I will keep you updated and hopefully my next blog won’t take so long that it’s title will be “IT’S A BOY!”